


paman tua (you wait for the sun)

by jaembinn



Series: selamat ulang tahun [3]
Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Not K-Pop Idols, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cute Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun, Flashbacks, Hallucinations, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Coming Out, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Insecurity, M/M, Mentioned Huening Kai, Open Ending, Sad Choi Soobin, Sad Choi Yeonjun, Some Plot, With A Twist, at this point you will never know if they live together or not, based on nadin amizah's "paman tua", choi yeonjun centric, hallucinations/multiverses glitching, he only has one dialogue here, work fatigue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:53:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25837579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaembinn/pseuds/jaembinn
Summary: "Is it time for you to go home, son?"Or,Yeonjun talks, unknowingly, to his future self on the train.
Relationships: Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun
Series: selamat ulang tahun [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1841662
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	paman tua (you wait for the sun)

**PRESENT**

On the train, Yeonjun ponders. _When will I be home?_

He once had a conversation with a junior student from his school, his name was Kai, or at least that's what Yeonjun remembers. He's full of bubbles, life seemingly completed with tons of rainbows all around his body and his mouth never stops from blabbering words, words that might irritate but would soften people's brick moods down in the end. Kai once had a conversation with him at school after their volley club event ended. All sweaty and full of excessive breaths, Kai said,

"I can't wait to go home!"

Home. It started from that word.

Sure, what Kai meant was home, the home that the majority of people all around the world have. The place where people live (hopefully) permanently, especially as a member of a family or a household. Nothing can go wrong with that. It's just, home. A place where you sleep, a place where you run away into when things get so stressful outside. A place where you're supposed to feel stress-free. Why, what's making him overthink about the definition of home? He has a home, he has an averagely loving family. No siblings, though, but he's okay with that.

So why the sudden insecurity?

 _There's nothing to be worried about, Yeonjun_. He told himself. Kai said the same thing to him too.

Exactly four years after the conversation, with no Kai near him, Yeonjun ponders the same thing on the train. _Home isn't something to be worried about, Yeonjun-ah._

His muscles ache, eyes heavy enough to droop down and eventually let him sleep inside the quiet train, but he can't. He's not home yet. He can't let his guard down when he's not home. He has more college work to do at home, as well. What's the point in sleeping now? Although he's aware that there's nothing suspicious going on at that moment, and so his eyes start to droop, mind still conscious enough to count just how lonely he is. Not much people sitting around him, per se. Of course, it's 5 in the morning. Two or three college students like Yeonjun sit so far away from each other, and there's a few other couples just hanging their heads scrolling through their phones, and there's a man around his 50s wearing a formal work suit, sitting only a few inches away from Yeonjun, just right by his side. Yeonjun almost squeezes out his eyes when he noticed the man, side appearance totally having the exact resemblance as his father.

_It can't be, right?_

And then his eyes start to close by themselves again the second he realizes it wasn't really his father. Yeonjun's in Seoul, both of his parents are still in Bundang.

 _I really, really need sleep,_ he says to himself.

"Is it time for you to go home, son?"

("Is it time for you to go home, hyung?"

Yeonjun cracks out a loud laugh, pinching the younger's dumpling cheeks. "You said that as if you're the one being left by me."

Soobin flails his hand around, freeing himself from being pinched by his hyung's monstrous predator hands and he whines, lips almost turning into a smile but he knows he can't smile, or else it'd look like he's not sulking anymore. "You're annoying."

"I'm not," Yeonjun says a-matter-of-factly, he then ruffles the taller one's hair out of adorable frustration. "At least I'm home now.")

The man's voice is gruff, and yet still nasal enough for both of them to hear. Yeonjun catches himself fully awake, sits up straight, now feeling the extreme exhaustion climbing up to his body and yet he nods to the man, mumbling a small _yes, uncle,_ not wanting to look like his not-so-close friends who underestimate older people generally.

The man then hums as a reply, leaving Yeonjun and his insecurities to gamble up decisions inside his mind.

Courage gathered, Yeonjun clears his throat. "You must be going to work early then, uncle?"

"Oh, how I wish that would not be the case right now," the man laughs, still looking right ahead of him. Yeonjun follows the man's line of sight, towards the clear windows on the train and showing just how dark it is outside. It leaves a warm feeling inside Yeonjun's stomach. "I'm glad to say I'm going home, son. Work has been rough."

("I suppose school has been rough for you, huh?"

Yeonjun knows there's a hint of joke plastered on Soobin's words, he's probably intended to joke in the first place, Yeonjun can't blame that. But he's right, school has been slamming him up and down, not giving him any breaks to breathe for a bit. Today was the last strike, and he wants nothing but to go home now.

Just, home. Nothing else. And maybe at that day, he's not fully aware that his home is right in front of him, all with the cocky giggles and bunny decorations around this certain home.

With that, he doesn't realize. Even after the second he lunges towards Soobin's warm hug, calming him from the angry tears to come.)

Oh, Yeonjun feels bad. The warm feeling leaves his chest instantaneously and he almost trembles. Probably from the fatigue symptoms. "I'm sorry about that."

"No need to," for the first time ever, the man looks back at him, and he smiles. "I have kids at home. It's a little tiring, but they're my support system now. At least when I arrive, rough days won't feel rough anymore."

("No need to," Soobin almost whines, a tear croaks out of his eye. "God, hyung. Please. Don't be sorry. You're not, you're not supposed to be sorry."

Yeonjun can feel himself trembling so hard, it's like he's about to fall apart, even if Soobin is trying his best to hold his hyung, all his best. But he can't. The thought of Yeonjun just being himself, loving anyone he wants to, and getting his own parents to know this specific matter that'd end up throwing screams of disappointment everywhere around his home just breaks him so bad. He has no siblings, no one for his parents to be distracted with. It's all about him now. So now it feels just more confusing, even Yeonjun himself is disappointed. In what? He doesn't know. It could be in his parents' implicit tendencies on disliking same-sex attraction, or it could be just in himself.

"Jjuni hyung," Soobin calls him the moment Yeonjun tries to shy away from the younger's embrace, leaving a weird feeling on Yeonjun's stomach back again. "Snap out of it, I know what you're thinking. Stop it, hey. Hyung. Look at me, hyung."

Yeonjun doesn't. Soobin holds him tighter.

"I'm so proud of you, hyung. Thank you for telling me all," Soobin stops talking, then he laughs in the middle of his own tears. "All of this. It's, I know it's confusing but you gotta stand tall for me, hyung. Do it for me. Help me out, don't be sorry for yourself. Don't be sorry for, for why you have your own decision on who you want to fall in love with. Never do that again, hyung. Please. For me."

And finally, Yeonjun looks back at his precious bunny the second he felt a longing kiss on his forehead.)

"Ah," Yeonjun nods with a small smile on his lips. Kids are cool, they might be annoying at times, but they're still cool. "I hope your home's a second away, uncle."

The man smiles again, raising his hand a bit to pat Yeonjun's shoulder, with the younger one being unaware of the dimmed lady-like voice soaring through the speakers inside the train. It's probably mentioning that the train will stop on a certain district in Seoul. Still, Yeonjun can't hear it. "Yours as well, Yeonjun-ah."

The man stands up, tidying his own outfit and he starts to leave. His wallet drops.

"Wait," he's about to shout, but the man is too quick and Yeonjun groans in frustration as to what the hell is going on and the fact that the man dropped his wallet, but then Yeonjun picks it up in the end, opens it, only to find pictures of the man and a woman, and one more picture of two familiar boys he's seen somewhere around his mid teenage years.

Yeonjun sits back down, overwhelmed. He quickly looks back at the wallet, the man and his wife's pictures are now empty, leaving only the ones with him and Soobin.

"Fuck," Yeonjun quietly hits his own forehead with the wallet, realizing that it's actually his. "I really, really need to be home."

And so he does. Once the sun rises, a confused boy with dimples on his cheeks starts to nag at him for arriving home so late, with Yeonjun not saying anything and just lunging forward to Soobin's arms as a _shut up, just hold me_ hug. Yeonjun laughs, noticing how the sun rises even more and the fresh light hitting Soobin's skin like honey.

He's right. Home's only a second away.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you liked it <3 a comment a day, keeps the author's sadness away!! comments and kudos will always be appreciated. have a good day!!! pls do remember to always cherish your home and keep them close to your heart
> 
> p.s. you could say that it's probably just yeonjun hallucinating, or that the universe decides to tell him something


End file.
